What is love? A feeling or an action?

This was the question which preoccupied me during most my marriage, and so my first public appearance at the Boys and Girls Club was dedicated to this issue. Appearing in front on a dozen or so pre-teenagers I asked them: Is love a feeling or an action? Almost all children responded quickly, it is a feeeling. My point back then was that love is more than just a fuzzy and warm sensation which comes over us when we are with that special someone, or when our parents do nice things for us and therefore make us 'feel' loved.

If love is just a feeling, it can come and go at any time, but what about genuine, undonditional love, the kind which endures all and does not depend on what we get in return.

During my marriage of 12 years, a time which was extremely difficult for me I developed the idea, (and this was also my Aol screenname during that time) that love(i)s (a)n attitude. Ultimately it is all about how we treat others, how we make them feel, how we show them that we love them through our actions and deeds.

Never having experienced the wonderful feeling of 'being in' love I assumed that love is all about what we do, and how we relate ourselves to others. Of course there is a legitimate point to that, but not until last year when I met an amazing woman via the internet did I realize that actually my young audience at the Boys and Girls club was also right. More than just an attitude, more than just something we do for somebody else, love is something we feel once we get the sense from the person we are with that we are being loved.

In summary, I guess it is safe to say that love is both a feeling and an action. When we feel love, be it towards a person, God, or humanity in general, more than just having a warm and fuzzy feeling we are motivated to act in loving ways towards the object of our love.

This is a very complex and far reaching issue, and I will definitely write about this some other time, but I just wanted to introduce this concept to you, and hopefully provide you with some food for thought about the true meaning and essence of love.


Thank you for reading.

Your comments and feedback are highly appreciated.